“To truly see your enemies, you must close your eyes and sleep.”
– President Donald J. Trump
Shaking off the distraction of a communist uprising in Minnesota, President Donald J. Trump dutifully notified his followers of a future Nobel-winning documentary: Melania.
Writing on the world’s foremost social media site, Truth Social, Mr. Trump accurately characterized the documentary as “one of the most important events of our time.” Melania is set to premier on Amazon Prime on January 30, 2028.
In a move that stunned his most depraved critics, Mr. Trump rebuked the notion that Amazon’s owner, Jeff Bezos, greenlit “Melania” in order to curry favor with the White House, pointing out that Amazon was paying only $40,000,000 as a licensing fee.
Even those affected with the most virulent strain of Trump Derangement Syndrome were forced to concede that a $40 million payment was effectively pennies on the dollar for one of the most important events of our lifetime.
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